Exchequers is a recurring sketch featured in Series 1 of the original Spitting Image, centring around the eponymous retirement home for ex-prime ministers. Upon entering the home for the first time, Harold Wilson is horrified to discover his former Tory rivals and successor James Callaghan living there, and frequently attempts to escape the high-security home and the wrath of its abusive matron, Queen Victoria.
Sketches[]
Episode 1[]
Harold Wilson enters Exchequers, believing it be his own retirement residence. He meets the wheelchair-bound Alec Douglas-Home and the deaf Harold Macmillan, who he quickly realises are his old Tory rivals, and is also dismayed to be met with his successor James Callaghan. He laments about how horrible it will be for him to spend his twilight years with Tories and after hearing Edward Heath play on his organ, attempts to leave, but as Callaghan points out, the home is heavily guarded by Dobermans and other deadly traps. Wilson instead calls for his secretary Marcia Williams, causing Queen Victoria, the matron, to come downstairs, demanding to know who's making the noise. She catches Wilson and tricks him into drinking his medicine by telling him how "young Kinnock's doing a good job." Michael Foot soon arrives, looking for odd jobs. An enraged Wilson stops crying and kicks him out of the window for being a failure and not an ex-prime minister. Victoria punishes him again by slapping him and making him eat his soup, while throwing Foot out of the window again. While attempting to eat his soup, a "fly" attached to a rope annoys him and lands in his soup. He yoinks it out, causing Douglas-Home, who was controlling the fly with his fishing rod, to tumble downstairs. Wilson moans about how his soup has been ruined while Macmillan attempts to reassure him.
Episode 2[]
While Wilson is sleeping, Macmillan tells the viewers about Prince Andrew, leading into the song "Just A Prince Who Can't Say No".